Day 17: A picture of something that has made a huge impact on my life

Asalaam Alaikum

I couldn't think of anything that has made a HUGE impact on my life recently but one thing that has generally made an impact on me was going to university.

Although born muslim I wasn't particularly interested in Islam and was just going through the motions to keep my parents happy.

However at university I met a lovely bunch of sisters who helped me strengthen my faith. I will be the first to admit I still have long way to go but they steered me in the right direction.

Source

Day 16: A picture of someone who inspires me

Asalaam Alaikum

I thought and thought about this one. Then I remembered a quote of Mahatma Gandhi I like.

Man often becomes what he believes himself to be. If I keep on saying to myself that I cannot do a certain thing, it is possible that I may end by really becoming incapable of doing it. On the contrary, if I shall have the belief that I can do it, I shall surely acquire the capacity to do it, even if I may not have it at the beginning.
~gandhi Quotes

source

Silent Sunday: Material Shopping!!!

First visit to a friends house

Asalaam Alaikum

Well today my munchkin went round to her friends house for a couple of hours. It's the first time she's been to someones house and stayed there without me so it was an experience for us both.

I don't know the mother too well so I was unsure about sending her. Then thought maybe I'm being too paranoid  and over protective. My mum suggested I let her go as she is quite a shy child and needs to come out of her shell a bit more.

For some odd reason she seems scared of adults but with other children she is ok. We got to the house and her friends father opened the door and then the mother came to the door. That was it... my little one was ready to bolt! She hid behind me and then tried to drag me back to the car with more strength than I realised she had! Wow I thought, the chappatti and curry you had earlier has given you superhuman strength.

I then realised I had to make her go inside if only to try to improve her confidence. So I went inside with her for a little while. Her friend was so happy to see her and tried to get her to take her coat off. Then started the battle of her friend trying to undo her zip and munchkin doing it back up! It was actually quite funny at the time!

We then suggested she went upstairs to the bedroom with her friend and she seemed quite happy with that as it meant escaping from the adults. I was able to leave the house albeit slightly reluctantly. The thing that put me slightly at ease was it was a Muslim family and I wouldn't have to worry about what she ate and I gave them my number incase she freaked out after I had gone.

I got home and started clock watching. First time in absolutely ages I have a whole 2 hours to myself and I didn't know what to do with myself! Sad I know!!! I ended up catching up with the housework just to take my mind off the time! Ummm helloo?? Why didn't I just relax..... no hubby, no child!? Peace and quiet!!

Alhamdulillah she had a lovely time! I think I was just worrying for no reason. Or maybe it is part of my reluctance to admit my baby girl is growing up.

Day 15: A picture of something I want to do before I die

Asalaam Alaikum 

Well it goes without saying that one of the things I want to do is go on hajj inshAllah!

So I thought I would be different and also put a few other things I would like to do.

I want to see my child/children grow up and be successful inshAllah.

I want to travel a bit more. 

I want to do a bunjee jump!

I could go on forever but one other thing I would love to do is rally driving!!

source

Day 14: A picture of someone I could never imagine my life without

Asalaam Alaikum

I can no longer imagine my life without my daughter. Yes I was initially freaked out at the idea of being a mum but now I would not change it for the world. Even the tantrums and cheekiness! Alhamdulillah! 

A daughter may outgrow your lap, but she will never outgrow your heart. 

 ~Author Unknown

A daughter is the happy memories of the past, the joyful moments of the present, and the hope and promise of the future.  

~Author Unknown

A lovely book!

Asalaam Alaikum!


When munchkin was aboout 2 years old I went to our local islamic shop and I came across this book.


I think I got a bit carried away as obviously H couldn't read but the colours were so vibrant it caught my eye and I just had to buy it. It is a Key Stage 1 book, suitable for 5 -7 year olds.



I had put the book away but the other night I found it and I snuggled up with munchkin on her bed and we read through it with her.

The story is basically about a butterfly who is born without any colour. Aisha, (the butterfly), is content with the way she is. Then as she does good deeds, colours appear on her wings. The more good deeds she does the more beautiful she becomes.

I just love the book. The author really manages to engage the reader. She has come up with a fictional country, Nectarland and has given facts about this land. She also explains the way caterpillars become butterflies in a fun and easy way to understand.

With younger children, the pictures and colours will keep them interested long enough for you to discuss the moral of the story.

I will be looking out for more books by this author.

Day 13: A picture of my favourite band or artist

Aslaam Alaikum

I found this one slightly difficult as I don't really have a favourite band or artist. I used to listen to music a lot when I was younger when I didn't realise it was wrong.

In those days I used to listen to RnB alot and I've chosen this artist as my favourite as I loved some of her tracks and it was a tragedy she died so young in 2001. She had a bright future ahead of her in the music world.

Aaliyah

(Pic from google images)

Day 12 : A picture of your favourite memory

Asalaam Alaikum




My favourite memory has to be of my grandmother - May Allah (swt) grant her Jannah Ameen



I remember when I was younger we used to go to Pakistan and I would get lots of cuddles and go to sleep in her bed after getting all the mosquitoes out of the net round the bed!

Day 11: A picture of something I hate

Asalaam Alaikum

Oh gosh I didn't even have to think about this one.

I hate.................. SPIDERS!!  Even thinking about them scare me! Do you know how difficult it was to even google the word spiders and look at the pictures???!!!! Oh my!

I think this fear started from when my brothers used to scare me. The fear has stayed with me as I got older. I can cope with the small ones (tiny) but anything bigger I FREAK!!

Pic off google images

Little Explorers Magazine

Asalaam Alaikum




I've heard about this magazine for some time now but have yet to subscribe. My daughter is 4 years old so I think that it may be slightly advanced for her.





It does however seem to be a good idea as Islamic Magazines for children are lacking. The first issue was released in August 2010 and was a Ramadan issue.


Taken from their site:
It is attractively designed and educationally structured to capture our children's attention and maximize the impact of the Islamic messages contained within its pages.


I would be interested to hear from anyone who has subscribed and what they think of it.

Day 10: A picture of your most treasured item

Asalaam Alaikum

Gosh this one was a tough one as I don't have anything that I treasure more than anything.

Then I remembered my trolls stored away in my cupboard.

You may laugh but quite a few years back I was into the trolls! 

I've since got rid of them all except these two. That is because they were one of the last things my dear brother gave to me before he died.

Day 9: A picture of me and someone who has gotten me through the most

Asalaam Alaikum

Again I can't post a picture of myself or my friends (sorry).

In all honesty it is my friends who have gotten me through the most. Some of them them have been through it all with me, the good and the bad. I wouldn't have got through my trials without them.

Thank you all x

Silent Sunday: New budgie!

Isn't it time for another baby??

b

Asalaam Alaikum




My daughter is now 4 and a half mashAllah.


Since she was 18 months I have been getting comments that isn't it time I had another child? As she gets older it gets worse.


I was out and about today and 2 of my mums friends had lost family members so we went to pay our respects. I don't often see many people as I'm busy at work and generally like to keep myself to myself when it comes to my mums friends. Wise choice, believe me.


After the initial greetings I think we managed to last 5 minutes (WOW!!) before I got asked what was happening.


There seems to be the mentality that if I'm not pregnant by now something MUST be wrong.


I am at that stage now where it takes every ounce of self control to grit my teeth, smile sweetly and say whenever Allah (SWT) wills. I was this close to being bitchy to a woman who said you shouldn't try to prevent it happening. I AM NOT!!


It's none of your business!!


Then they talk about the girl who mashAllah has 6 kids all one after another saying she should stop now. IT'S UP TO HER!!!


You can't win with these women!!

Day 7: A picture of my hero

Asalaam Alaikum

I want to dedicate this honour to my brother who passed away when I was 15.

The pain doesn't go away. You just learn to live with it.

I love you bro and miss you more each day. Even now thinking about you brings tears to my eyes.

xxxx

I think my words say it all, a picture isn't needed.

Day 6: A picture of someone I do the silliest thing with

Asalaam Alaikum

Me do silly things??? As if. I don't do silly!!!

Yeah right!!!

I guess I am the most silliest with my friends, in particular my university friends! Again I can't add any pics without their permission!

We used to get up to all sorts! Water fights, food fights..... Oh I miss those days! 

Headlice!!!

Asalaam Alaikum!

Headlice make my skin crawl!

Yuck!

Munchkin got her first letter from school last week saying headlice had been spotted in her class. I didn't think much of it as I didn't see her scratching. So I thought we had escaped! Yay!!!

More fool me!

Today my mum noticed her scratching so checked her head.....she spotted eggs!!!

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

So off I go in a mad dash to the chemist! They only had the solution you have to leave in your head for 12 hours or overnight. So went to another and thankfully they had the 10 minute one! Munchkin asked if she had ants in her head!! LOL

So she has now been treated and inshAllah we have got rid of them. Having said that I am now paranoid so think I will have to treat myself just to be on the safe side.

One good thing did come out of this. The chemist told me about a scheme they have. He gave me a book and I can get medicine for munchkin free. They were giving me the 12 hours solution free but I wanted the 10 minute one. However, he still gave me the book and said if she ever has a cold/temperature/cough I can get her medicine free over the counter!! YAY!

Day 6: A picture that makes me laugh

Asalaam Alaikum!

This picture always makes me smile. I had taken my budgie round to my sister's house and her cat was VERY interested in it.

On the other hand my budgie was looking at the cat in contempt as if to say 'Ha you can't get me!'

It even went as far as pecking the cat on it's paw!!

Day 5: Picture of something I love

Asalaam Alaikum!

Wow this one was a difficult one.

First I was going to put up a winter scene because although I'm not fond of snow I love the scenery. Then I was going to put a picture of my favourite flower: orchids.

I finally decided on posting a picture of my rabbit! As I love him to bits! He is a right cheeky one and will eat my plants when I am not looking and will nudge my hand in the morning when I give him breakfast. Then I get my exercise when I have to chase him round the garden to catch him!

Day 4: Something I would like to do again

Asalaam Alaikum

One thing I would like to do is visit Murree in Pakistan again. I got married in Pakistan and I went to Murree with my hubby after we got married but returned immediately as my father suddenly got very ill.

The scenery was breath taking at times. I would love to go and visit it properly.

InshAllah next time we visit Pakistan will ask hubby if we can spend a couple of days there.

Weaning

Asalaam Alaikum

So when did you start to wean your children ie stop giving them breastmilk (if you were breastfeeding) exclusively? The recommended 6 months? Or earlier? 

These days if you suggest weaning before 6 months the health visitor will look at you in total horror as if you have completely lost your head. 

As a first time mum things can get a bit confusing. On the one hand, I had my mother pushing me to allow my daughter to try some food before she was 6 months with the attitude you had solids at 4 months and it never did you any harm. Then on the other hand, I hand the health visitors and most books saying to give solids before 6 months was a big fat NO!

So who do you listen to? Your mother who has experience of 4 children? Or the health professionals who have supposedly conducted years of research?

I listened to my child. She started taking an interest in food at 5 months. I held off for a further 2 weeks and introduced solids to her at 5 and a half months.

Now the health professionals are saying weaning before 6 months may be better. What next? Weaning before 4 months is better? I've stopped taking much notice of these so called health professionals. I trust my child and my instincts.

You can read  more about the suggestion to wean earlier here

First Blog Award

Asalaam Alaikum!

I have been tagged in this so going along with it!!

Awarded by: Yara

What now?

Thank you for my first ever award!

I now need to write 7 facts about myself, and tag 7 other bloggers to do the same... I will try to keep the facts different this time and unusual

7 facts about me: 

1. I love henna and wish I could apply pretty designs properly!

2. I want to have a cat and a horse. Oh and a parrot too!

3. I'm a kind generous person but if some upsets me I push them out of my life....

4. I want to have a BMW! 

5. I sometimes wish I could live in the countryside

6. I want to travel more

7. I would love to keep chickens in my back garden

Right I need 7 people to tag. I read a few blogs but never tagged anyone.... lets have a go

Day 3. Cast of favourite show

Asalaam Alaikum

Oh I have a number of favourite shows but I must dedicate this blog post to.........

****UGLY BETTY!!****

Yes at times it was down right daft but it kept me entertained. The night it ended I was totally miserable! 

Source

Silent Sunday: Bird Fight

Asalaam Alaikum and Hello! 

I've finally decided to take part in 'Silent Sunday'

Full details can be found here

Basically you just post a picture without any words 

(I'm adding words this time as it's my first time of participating!)

So here's my Silent Sunday

Day 2 - A picture of yourself and someone you have been closest with the longest

Asalaam Alaikum!

Again I apologise as I am not willing to put up my friend's picture without her permission! But I reckon this picture shows how much I love her.

I have a few friends who I am close to but this friend I have known slightly longer than the others. I met her in my first year at uni and we have been firm friends since.

I love her with all my heart and would do anything for her. We do have times when we can go for a few months without speaking to each other, but we always know we are there for each other. I love her daughter like my own and her whole family treat me as part of their family whenever I visit her, which I must admit is not frequent enough.

She is not a 'fake' friend and won't tell me what I simply want to hear. She will be brutally honest and will tell me if I am being unreasonable or a b*!c%

That's what a friend should be like. Love you sis! xx

Sisterswhoblog Network

Asalaam Alaikum

I came across this site recently and I highly recommend you join! It is a great way of interacting with other sisters who blog and mashAllah I have already come across quite a few interesting blogs which I take the time to read. I am now permanently rooted to my chair!!

Well done to the sister who created it and inshAllah I hope the site goes from strength to strength!

Visit Sisterswhoblog Network

DAY 1: A picture and 15 facts

Asalaam Alaikum

I'm taking part in a 30 day photo challenge..... lets see how far I get! 

I do apologise but I won't be putting a picture of myself on my blog. 

So this is my compromise!

1. I am in my late twenties

2. I have one daughter who is 4 (alhamdulillah!)

3. I live in the UK

4. I have a rabbit and budgie

5. I'm a chocoholic!

6. I have a law degree

7. I work with the Citizens Advice Bureau

8. I would love to own my own horse and stables

9. I am admin on a forum Muslimahs United

10. I love reading

11. I love cars and driving! Would love to go on one of those one day car racing experience!

12. I can get angry quite quickly!

13. My background is Pakistani

14. I would love to write a book

15. I want to move out of the UK

Parenting: Appreciate your parents

Asalaam Alaikum.

 I saw a client today at work and it really made me think.

The poor woman's husband had passed away some time ago and she had struggled to bring up 3 sons on her own. Now they are at the age where they can support their mother but it seems like they are doing nothing. She asked one to work and help out but he left home and she doesn't know where he is. She's about to be evicted from her home and she is running around trying to resolve the issue but as she can't speak English it is difficult. All this had aged her and she looked much older than her years. She said they don't respect her and don't listen to her.

 My heart went out to this poor woman.

 It just made me think. How happy we are when our children are born. The dreams and hopes we have for them and the future. The love we feel for them before they are even born. The pain we go through to give birth and for some even a very difficult pregnancy. We watch them grow up, start to walk, talk and explore things around them.

I wondered how I would feel if munchkin ever treated me like that. It didn't bear thinking about. I'm sure a part of me inside would die if my child treated me like that, as it seems it has done with this woman.

 It scared me. A child shouldn't turn on their parents like this. It could happen to anyone.

 Appreciate your parents. Without them you wouldn't even be here.

1000 Awesome Things: tag!

Asalaam Alaikum

Idea taken from the blog Muslimahs Musings (see blog post below) and as she put it, 'If you are reading this you are tagged!'

Basically you have to check out this blog 1000 Awesome Things
Then use this page to choose your favourites.

You can then tag other bloggers to do the same! Add your link to the bottom to show you have done it!

Theres so many to choose from but here are a few of my favourites!

#995 Finding money you didn’t even know you lost
#982 Picking your nose  (hahaha sorry I couldn't resist!)
#973 Sleeping in new bed sheets
#966 Living with someone who doesn’t mind killing spiders
#944 Your pillow
#942 Somebody flashing their high beams at you to warn you about the cops
#936 Perfect parallel-parking on the first try
#927 A really cold glass of water on a really hot day
#913 Having a whole row by yourself on the plane
#892 Taking your shoes and socks off after a really long day
#876 Taking your bra off after wearing it for hours
#859 Playing with a baby and not having to change its diaper
#858 The other side of the pillow
#843 Getting out of the car after a really long trip
#820 Making it out of the bathroom at work before anyone realizes you made it smell that way (lol love it!)
#815 When you nudge the person snoring next to you and it makes them stop
#808 Coming home after a long day to the smell of someone cooking dinner (rarely happens)
#730 When the baby’s diaper isn’t as bad as you were expecting
#720 The final seconds of untangling a really big knot
#690 When the person scratching your back finds that one really itchy spot
#634 The moment on a roller coaster after you get to the top of the first hill and before you go down it
#631 Coming back to your own bed after a long trip
#604 Walking on grass with bare feet
#596 Driving on the highway really late at night when the roads are empty
#570 When a little baby gives you a hug before it leaves
#568 Your mom’s love
#561 Letting the waves bury your feet at the beach
#556 When you’re in the fastest moving lane in a traffic jam
#490 Driving around with the windows down on late summer nights
#483 Do Nothing Days
#405 When someone pronounces your name right on the first try
#382 Catching up to the car that just passed you at the next red light
#357 When the baby crying on your flight finally shuts up




And the list appears to end at 334..... Link back to yout post below!

Muslimahs Musings: 1000 Awesome Things: tag!

Muslimahs Musings: 1000 Awesome Things: tag!: "1000 Awesome Things: tag!"

Jealousy and envy

Asalaam Alaikum

 It has been narrated that the prophet (peace be upon him) said: “avoid jealousy because it burns good deeds the way fire burns wood.”  

I could go into the islamic aspect of jealousy a bit more but the purpose of my blog is not to make it a religious one but keep it general with my random ramblings!

I see jealously and envy a lot around me. I have a family member who appears to be jealous of anything my family purchases. The result, he has to go out and get the same thing but better if possible.

Now I have a Ford car and my bro had a Fiat. This person went out and first got a newer version of the Fiat, and then got his wife a newer version of my Ford. (This is after both of them saying it was not a good car - I think they were trying to make me jealous).

I got a nintendo DSi. He went out and got the hand held PSP thing? (cant remember what its called).

I got a black wii, he now has the red wii.

My parents got a new TV, he went and got one.

And the list goes on!

My brother and myself noticed this so we started to play with him a bit. My bro said he was going to buy a sat nav...... yep you guessed it, he got one before my bro could. I said I reckon samsung phones are much better and was going to get one .... he got one first.

WHY? Just be grateful for what you do have and don't put yourself into debt getting things that you don't really want or need! 

Alhamdulillah for what I have and that I don't feel the need to be like this person!

However, I am now tempted to hire a BMW for the day and make sure he sees me in it!!! 

Shall I do it?? ;)

Jack Straw's Comments

Asalaam Alaikum

I am absolutely fuming today.

Taken from Sky News: The Blackburn MP talked of a "specific problem" involving Pakistani men who were "fizzing and popping with testosterone". He added that a minority of these young men considered vulnerable white girls as "easy meat". "These white girls almost exclusively come from chaotic families, some are in care. Otherwise they would not be out on the streets, aged 12, 13, 14."Mr Straw said he believed the young men were targeting white girls because Pakistani-heritage girls were "off limits".

Are British white men not grooming girls? Are chinese? American? Why focus simply on the British Pakistanis? (who are in the minority).

Is Mr Straw and his colleague who support him asking other communities to deal with the sex offenders in their communities? It is a criminal offence, the justice system should deal with them. How do they expect the Pakistani community to deal with this and stop them? If someone is going to do this disgusting act then they will no matter what their background is.

If a British White did this would the headlines be WHITE BRITISH MAN?? No it would simply say man.

I work in the prison and unfortunately do sometimes come across sex offenders. I have yet to come across an Asian sex offender.

Mr Straw, I know quite a few 'white girls' married to British Pakistani's and living quite happily, having even converted to Islam. Maybe that is what is really worrying racist idiots who are prepared to stereotype a whole community.

It just seems another excuse to potentially stir trouble for muslims and hatred towards the pakistani community. 

(At this point I wish I had a punchbag!)

Sorry..... do I know you??

Asalaam Alaikum

Totally random blog post today!! 

Has it ever happened to you? When someone comes up to you and greets you...... and you have NO idea whatsoever who they are?

Decided to pop into town tonight as it was late night shopping. Stopped at a shop that sells cakes and rolls etc and when the girl at the till saw me her eyes lit up... 'Hello stranger! How are you?' She seemed sooo happy to see me.

There's me looking around to see if she is actually talking to someone behind. No..I'm the only one there.

'Ummm.... yeah good thanks.... how are you?' 

All the time still frantically trying to get my brain to function to remember who on earth this girl is.

She then asks if I'm still there. By this I assume she means where I work. So I just say yes... still totally clueless as to who she is.

She spots my daughter and then tries to talk to munchkin who promptly hid behind me. 'So you just have the one?'

'Ummmm ...yes.... '

Thankfully I then got saved by another customer!

My hubby asked me who it was. He thinks I should have said sorry I don't recognise you..... but I would feel a bit embarrassed to do that!

3 hours later I'm still wondering who she was!

Forced Marriages

I have had to edit this post as it had personal information in and as my blog is no longer anonymous, (I have been discovered), I have had to edit it to remove any personal references.
22/12/2011

Asalaam Alaikum

So time for another serious blog post I think! Forced marriages to me is parenting gone wrong!!

Forced marriages tend to hit the headlines a lot and unfortunately are a common ocurrance. Alot of the time the parents think they are doing the right thing by their child and that they have picked the best spouse possible. However sometimes it can be to do with land issues etc.  Please note arranged marriages are different to forced marriages.

I see it all too often in forums I browse.... 'My parents want me to marry so and so but I don't want to. What should I do?'

The usual reply is islamically no-one can force you so just say no. It is your right to say no.

If only it was as easy as that.

It is simple for brothers and sisters to sit in the comfort of their own homes tapping away at their PC's and laptops and saying 'Hey no problem, you just have to say no.' They probably have not been put in this situation and unlikely (inshAllah) to be put into this position so it's easy for them to say that.

One comment from a sister totally infuriated me. It was something along the lines of well if you go ahead and get married willingly to keep your parents happy then it's not really forced is it?? How naive. She does not know what this sister may be going through. 

The purpose of this post really is to reach out to any sisters who may be going through something similar and to show them they are not alone. Also to show the term 'forced' isn't as clear cut as being physically dragged by your hair kicking and screaming. 

If anyone just wants someone to listen to them then I can offer my ear! 

Also if any of you are being forced into a marriage then you can also get help from this organisation: Forced Marriage Unit

It is going to be difficult to wipe out forced marriages even though islamically it is incorrect.

Pearl Daisy

Asalaam Alaikum

I came across a site a few months back which I felt I should share here incase anyone has not come across it.

The sister has a massive following mashAllah and even does online tutorials on how to put on the hijab/hoojab. The hoojab seems to be like a hijab but with a hood. I have seen some of the tutorials and they are easy to follow and the sister seems like a lovely, friendly person. 

Taken from the sisters facebook page: 

 Pearl Daisy is the online store to visit for all your hijabi needs, whether you're looking for hijabs, stunning brooches, or our very own creation: the Hoojab! 

The sister has a massive following mashAllah and even does online tutorials on how to put on the hijab/hoojab. The hoojab seems to be like a hijab but with a hood.

I have not actually ordered any hijabs/hoojaabs from the site but did order a hijaabling as a gift for a friend:

It arrived very quickly and came in a lovely pink bag with pink tissue paper. MashAllah very well presented.

Well done to the sister on her efforts and inshAllah her business will continue to grow. 

Check out her site inshAllah.