That’s not my daughter!!

Where has my sweet innocent 6 year old gone? The one that was the perfect toddler and would do as I say without any question. Who wouldn’t answer back and wouldn’t smirk behind my back.
This child currently in my house is not my daughter. Someone has swapped her!!
Well if you haven’t guessed by now I will make it clear. Munchkin 1 has turned into a major brat.
So much so that when she said she wanted to go live with my parents I was like fine! And I am sad to say I would feel relieved if she did!!!
She hasn’t left home yet, even though she has said (well written down) that she hates me forever. I wouldn’t let her move anyway.
I have seen a change in her since she started school. However, her behaviour has gotten worse since munchkin 2 arrived. She will not listen to what we say. Take for example, the other day her dad took her shopping. They came home late and both I and my husband told her not to open her magazine and get ready for bed. She went upstairs and immediately opened the magazine.
I tell her off and she smirks. I tell her not to do anything, she will carry on and do it if she can get away with it. I tell her to be quiet and she will proceed to finish what she was initially saying.
She goes and hits my sister. That is my sisters fault as I had told her to stamp on that behaviour but they had found it funny. Well no use complaining about it now is it?! But it is concerning as she will think it is ok to do that to me when she is angry. 
My family are the ones that jokingly say to her you can move here if your mum tells you off. Well she has taken it literally and now thinks she can get away with murder because she can always go and move in with the grandparents.
Arrrgggghhh I just want to scream. I do not want to deal with a stroppy 6 year old as well as a newborn who still wants feeding pretty much every 2 hours.
I want to run away!!!
Anyone want 2 kids?!
Since writing this, I have had a written apology from the 6 year old. But she then threatened to throw it in the bin when I took a bangle off her as she was throwing it around! 
Any suggestions on the best way to deal with this behaviour?

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  • Not an expert, but people often swear by reinforcing and praising good behaviour, while ignoring the minor bad behaviour. I would only guess that she's acting up because the attention she used to get is now shared with the baby. Maybe you should set aside special mommy-daighter time when the baby's asleep, to make her feel less neglected?

  • I imagine it's tough dear. I don't have any miracle recipe unfortunately, just wishing you things get better and maybe as Mariam says try to spend some time together, some mum-daughter special treat now and then.
    Take care. xx

  • My family are the ones that jokingly say to her you can move here if your mum tells you off. Well she has taken it literally and now thinks she can get away with murder because she can always go and move in with the grandparents.

    And our families always make it worse so I feel you sister 🙂 My mum even bought a romper for my toddler with the message "If Mommy Says No, Ask Grandma" so how is that healthy for her grandchild, to disobey her mum?

  • aaaw…Its always hard for children when a new sibling arrives..they went from being the only on…then having to share their mothers love and attention….try and involve your daughter as much as you can..tell her you need help looking after the baby ( as shes the big sister ) ask her to help. I suspect the behaviour is a way of getting any attention..even if its negative.. and then try and do some drawing,lego,games when baby is asleep..in time she will except the changes..Tell your family that although they may be joking it can be very damaging in the long term.

  • unfortunately new baby or not 6 year old girls are horrible – the new baby may have taken some of your time away but I wouldn't say thats the only reason behind her behaviour, girls just love to have the final say, test the boundaries and find their personalities – hope she has calmed abit, if not good luck – no real tips my daughter is 9 now and still alot liek this!