The thought of giving birth scares the living daylights out of me if I am honest.
With munchkin no1 I went through the pregnancy pretty much in denial that this baby had to come out eventually….I tried not to think about it at all as I would just get into a bit of a panic.
At school I was friends with 2 others and we used to say we would never have kids; one even went so far to say she would remove her uterus (not sure if she ever did but I know she hasn’t had any kids but keeps horses!)
The whole going through 9 months of labour, painful birth, and then screaming babies, sick, exploding nappies, whinging toddlers just did not appeal to me.
So when I fell pregnant with my first soon after marriage, I tried to totally block out the fact that I had to go through labour. That was pretty easy because after an initial bleeding scare the pregnancy was a breeze.
When I actually went into labour 2 weeks earlier than my due date, I was in denial – I didn’t believe baby could be early and I hadn’t mentally prepared myself for it.
Alhamdulillah the labour was quick. In less than 2 hours from waking up and gettting to the hospital, munchkin had arrived. It was all a bit panicked as they thought my placenta had burst so they started prepping me for a c-section. They gave me a spinal block so after that I felt nothing!!! But alhamdulillah I didn’t have to have a c-section. When they handed me munchkin I was in shock that it had happened so quickly and just looked at her thinking ‘OMG a baby!!’
Because I never fully experienced the pain of giving birth, I will admit I am slightly freaked out again. The fact that I have diabetes and that can mean a large baby is also freaking me out. In all honesty, as the final 3 month countdown begins I am TOTALLY freaking out. All the hospital appointments and scans don’t help. Yes they are making sure that everything is ok but it just panics me because it reminds me I NEED extra care to ensure nothing goes wrong.
I know I am just being a bit daft – must be the hormones on overdrive.